You probably heard this saying as often as I have.
But the number of times we heard it does not make it necessarily true. I hope it would be true but I have my doubts.
Looking back at my own life, four year old little Roland shows up, standing in front of his angry dad, trembling. It has been almost sixty years ago, but to this day when confronted with anger, I get easily scared. Only in the last years, since I have been doing consciously healing work around it, it is getting easier. All the years before, when I tried to avoid situations like that, when I learned to express anger, when I trained to receive anger, when I attempted to divert anger into sports or sublimate it into spiritual practices, all this did not really change a lot.
In the last years I changed my approach. Whenever I felt triggered, I take the time to sit with it, to get present with my feelings of fear, of feeling existentially threatened, and with the sadness that is hidden underneath this fear. Lately I can deal with it better, I can stay present longer and I recover faster when I experience anger.
Not only childhood trauma stick with us. Some of the things we carry started even before we were born. Even if we do not know the stories, these traumas of long ago times are written in our bodies. In the case that we are exposed to a trigger, all of a sudden the problem is there, a black-out, a numbness, a fear, an inexplainable sadness might overtake us, signs reminding us that we are dealing with residues of hidden trauma.
Scientists doing trauma research did some very interesting experiments. In one of them they exposed mice to a very comforting smell that all mice love. Then they gave them an electric shock. Pretty soon the mice responded already to the smell with trauma symptoms. They showed their distress in stiffening up, shaking and peeing even without an electric shock. So far, this was not surprising. But now the researchers bred these mice through four generations without exposing any of them neither to the smell nor to the electric shock. Then the fifth generation was exposed only to the smell. Guess what happened? They showed the same trauma responses as the very first generation even though four generations did not experience any trauma!
I thought this was shocking. Nothing healed by itself.
When I see children or grandchildren of war veterans, they often have strong trauma symptoms even though it was not them who had experienced the shocking events. In working with descendants of survivors of war or of the holocaust, I have seen that the less the story of the trauma has been told, the less the following generations are aware of what had happened to their parents or grandparents, the more they suffer, the more they seem to be affected.
In forty years of healing work I do not get the impression that time heals all wounds.
What heals is when we touch the energy that still resides in our bodies from old traumas, when we feel it and connect it with our loving heart. Our heart is the healer and love is the great transformer.
What we all need to heal is a healing relationship. Not often can we do it alone. And we do not need to do it alone.
A homeopathic treatment is a superb way of trauma healing, it is elegant in its energetic approach and often highly effective. The secret of its success is relationship. We are given two relationships that hold our healing path: one is with the homeopathic practitioner, and the other one is the relationship to a being of nature that understands our trouble deeply and that offers a perfect solution for it. This is the homeopathic remedy. Held between these two we can relax, we can feel safe and we can finally heal.
If you know someone who is suffering from an old trauma, think about forwarding him or her this newsletter or pass on my email address Roland@VancouverIslandHomeopathy.com .
Maybe you feel moved to leave a comment and to share what helped you in dealing with trauma. When we share our experiences, then we help each other find our path to healing. The world needs us to heal; because if we don’t, we pass it on. Just like the mice.